March was long and my screen time remained higher than it should be (9 hours on average–eep!). I don’t have to remind you that the world is terrifying, that the incompetence is staggering as is the lack of accountability. Things are getting spookier by the day, but for now, we’re here and we can still tell the truth. So we should. As often as we can. I have a cold so I’ll leave this here, lest I go on a Alkaselzer-induced rant. Anyway, onto the post!
Highlights from March
I’m still not over Luther. That documentary solidified something for me. I love watching other artists create—it’s always inspiring to me.
I chatted with some high school students up in the Bronx as part of a reading series. I love talking to the youth about writing and took the opportunity to do some anthropological observation. The kids are wearing lots of crop tops and baggy jeans (mind you it was 30 degrees) and it made me realize I was old because my main thought was where are the sweaters and coats?
Two people texted me about Queen Latifah at the Oscars—which I’m obsessed with because they know I love her. Unfortunately it was because of that Quincy Jones tribute which was very ???. There were so many options and they went with that one. Love her down though.
I went to a mobility pilates class at East River in Greenpoint that left me feeling stretched out and calm. I put a cork ball under my butt cheek to work out my muscles and did big circles with my legs. It was incredible, even though the reformer always makes me a little nauseous. I tested out the studio as part of their Gift Of Movement program, where they offer five free classes to the Black community during February. Those classes are valid for a month after you sign up, which led to me trying it out in March. When I went, there were two other Black girls in class, so it’s nice to see that the program is reaching the right people and folks are taking advantage of it. Shoutout to Asiah who sent it my way. For what it’s worth the class was also great, so I would pay for it after my credits run out.
C has been deep into audiobooks, she’s on her seventh book of the year. During a recent Sundays Only run we put on The Neighbor Favor, which was deeply entertaining while we did deliveries.
We went on a double date with Sean and Dontai and tried out Ambrosia Garden, a new Greek spot in Astoria. The food was good and the service was great—would recommend!
Alex came to Queens and we had dinner at a mid Italian spot and then walked to get cookies from Chip. We laughed until our ribs hurt and drank terrible wine. I loved it.
My maternal grandma turned 80-something and to celebrate I bought her a steak dinner from Ottomanelli’s in Woodside and red velvet cheesecake from Magnolia Bakery. She called me the day after and again few days later to tell me how much she loved it. Another highlight, her calling me to say she’s excited about St. John’s (my alma mater) performance in March Madness.
My friend Mercy has a queer reads book club and they read Homebodies for March. I visited in person to answer questions about the book and let them peek at a sex scene from my next novel. They popcorn-read it aloud and it was cool to hear them bring these characters to life.
I’ve been interviewing my friends about love for the thing I’m working on and I’ve been loving what I’m hearing. My first interview was Madison M. who offhandedly said something I’m still thinking about. When I asked her if love dies, she replied it does, like people do, and I don’t know—that moved something for me.
I went on two book dates this month, and visited Terrace Books and Community Bookstore for the first time. The bookstores, owned by the same people, might be my new favorites in Brooklyn. I love the curation—a mix of popular titles and translated works and releases from small presses.
I had a catch up lunch with Iman, a former coworker turned author friend. We had lunch at Sailor, a much-hyped spot that admittedly makes a decent chicken.
I’ve been burning the Homecourt Cocomoi candle and it smells divine. It has notes of coconut water, cedarwood, vetiver, sweet cardamom and black pepper. I’ll be sad when I burn it to the end.
We went on a double date with Cristal and Uti to AbuQir, an Egyptian spot in Astoria where you pick your seafood and then tell them how to cook it. Everything was so yummy and fresh.
Adrienne and Hannah and I got together for dim sum (Jing Li in LIC. If you go, get the fried red snapper, the fried rice and the beef ribs) and some chat. We all work in media but our dinners are always centered on the projects we’re trying to do outside of it. I always feel like I’m spinning a lot of plates, so it’s nice to talk to people who are doing something similar.
C and I have been committing to weekly date nights. The only parameters are that we reserve a day of the week—Mondays, usually—and spend some intentional time. We can rent a movie, go out, whatever, the only restriction is that we go on DND during and plan a little in advance. Last week, we went to a Mac Ayres concert. It was the most demographically diverse concert crowd I’ve seen in a while—we sat across from a middle-aged couple who were put on by their son—and I was pleased that he sang all my favorite songs. It was also my first time at Le Poisson Rouge, which is essentially a roomier Blue Note. Would love to see more shows at this venue.
An impromptu walk with Karissa in Astoria Park. I had said something offhand about going for a walk on the first nice day, and so when it was 80 degrees last Saturday she hit me up. I love stuff like that—the follow-through—and I’m excited to be making more impromptu hangout friends.
Sneaking in at the end of the month, my first cat Stella, suddenly got sick and had to be rushed to the vet. It was terrifying. Thankfully she’s okay right now, fingers crossed things stay that way.
Reading
Something Rotten by Andrew Lipstein - Something Rotten is about a couple that spends a summer in Denmark, escaping their lives in New York, where the wife, Cecilie is a New York Times reporter and the husband, Reuben, is a former NPR host and reluctant stay-at-home dad. Reuben is fired from his job at NPR after he gives his wife head during a zoom call, not realizing his coworkers can see him. Reuben, feeling dejected, arrives in Denmark with a chip on his shoulder and a general frustration at the world. There’s this sense that he feels wronged by the world and American society. Then there’s Cecilie, who hasn’t been home in years. She reunites with her friends and her ex-boyfriend, Jonah, who is terminally ill and refuses to get treatment. The book is told from both perspectives with Cecilie trying to convince Jonah to get help and Reuben taking up with Mikkel, another friend in the group. The two stories converge in a final dramatic twist, and while I liked the book’s structure more generally, I ultimately left this feeling like I didn’t really know what Something Rotten was trying to say. The reviews are characterizing it as a book about masculinity, but I found those observations confusing. Reuben is mostly exhausted by the performativity of goodness, and is concerned that he isn’t rewarded for “voting the right way,” and feels ashamed of being a man. It’s interesting to me that that passes for analysis when it feels moreso like Reuben’s way of coping with Cecilie’s reconnection with Jonah and the fact that all of this performativity, which maybe he never believed in, didn’t grant him the perception of being a good person. It’s an interesting peek into the supposedly liberal white man’s psyche and reminds me that we’re all having very different experiences.
Sula by Toni Morrison - Finished this and writing about it, more soon!
Blue Ruin by Hari Kunzru - I really liked this novel from Hari Kunzru, who is also the author of White Tears and Red Pill. Blue Ruin is the last in a thematic trilogy, though all of the books stand alone. It’s about a former artist Jay, who was supposed to be one of the greats, but ends up as a gig worker living in his car. One day he delivers food to a former fling. When they reunite, the class stratification is stark, with him living out of his car and her living on an estate in the woods. Alice invites him to stay at the house, kicking off a chain of events. The book is set in the early days of the pandemic, when everyone is wiping down groceries and worried about a societal collapse, which was both nostalgic and slightly triggering. All in all, I really loved this. Kunzru’s writing style really works for me and the musings about life and art were incredibly profound. I could’ve underlined most of the book. The plot gets a little iffy at times, it’s not a tight story and at times feels surreal or absurd, but I’d recommend it anyway. The writing is just that good.
They Were Her Property by Stephanie Jones-Rogers - I read this with Traci Thomas for The Stacks podcast because she saw it on my Books For Precedented Times reading list. . It’s about white women who owned slaves in the South, disrupting the myth that white women were innocent bystanders or complicit but not active in the slave trade. Slavery was the common way for women to own property, even women who were considered coverture in the eyes of the law—women under the protection and authority of her husband. Slave-owning existed outside of that structure, allowing women to accrue and maintain wealth generationally. They Were Her Property also illuminates the culture and tertiary economy surrounding chattel slavery. There were ceremonies for slave transfer, a magazine dedicated to responsible slave-owning, services that would ship disobedient slaves. It’s really interesting stuff. As Traci put it, white women got the best edit in history—able to claim innocence while wielding power all at once. An essential read.
Rejection by Tony Tulathimute - I tend to read books after the hype cycle passes, so I was late to Rejection, a book of interconnected short stories. It deals with characters dealing with romantic rejection and not being able to wrap their minds around why. They’re all ridiculous in recognizable ways. Tulathimute nails the feeling of our modern moment, from the texture of the group text to the performance of “good.” I really loved the beginning of it and was less into it by the end, mostly, I think, because there’s something exhausting about being in the minds of these characters. I really liked the construction of this though, it’s clever, and is a reminder that we can’t see ourselves the way other people do.
Elseship by Tree Abraham - I grabbed this one from the McNally Jackson staff picks section. I read the back—— and immediately added it to the pile. I read it in a single sitting. Cried through it, mostly. It’s creative nonfiction, and traces the contours of Tree’s love for her friend who’s not just her friend. What they have exists between the boundaries of friendship and romance. It’s not physical but deeply intimate—a queer, third thing that’s unexplainable unless you’ve experienced it. There was this sharp recognition in Tree’s feelings and thinking, that winding thought process that’s both about that person and the self. I don’t know that I’d recommend it to the layperson—it’s very specific—but it’s a book I’ll be thinking about for a long time.
J Wortham wrote about their foray into extreme survivalism for The New York Times (gift link). Unsurprisingly, surviving the apocalypse is expensive and exhausting. Reading it made me want to fight for something better and preserve the social safety nets we’ve already got while also recognizing that we should all probably know how to start a fire.
Watching
The White Lotus (HBO) - This season, The White Lotus heads to Thailand, and while I was initially very into this show about race, class, and social dynamics, now I care a lot less. I can barely pay attention this season, which isn’t Mike White’s fault exactly, but is indicative of my growing disinterest in the psychology and maladies of the wealthy and maladjusted. It’s still good TV but I don’t rush to watch it like in season’s past.
The Righteous Gemstones (HBO) - Few shows are funnier than The Righteous Gemstones, which is about a megachurch dynasty headed by a fearsome patriarch. All of the kids are vying for the top spot in Daddy’s heart—it’s sort of Succession adjacent, but very much its own thing.
The Wood (Paramount Plus) - Another entry in the movies-I-should’ve-already-seen category. This one is about three friends who are reliving their childhood before one of them gets married and moves away. Roland, Slim, and Mike have such a believable bond and it made me miss Black movies real bad, though I do think Black stories are getting told, just not in this way. I’d like to see it. Additionally, Sanaa Lathan and Omar Epps have the craziest chemistry—there’s a quick scene with them at the end, and I fully screamed the moment he looked at her. Don’t be surprised if I rewatch Love & Basketball in April.
Traitors UK (Peacock) - Traitors UK proved once again to be the superior franchise. The people are smarter by a mile—they actually have a notion of strategy. I can’t say how pissed I am that Boston Rob wasn’t immediately eliminated in the US version—that would’ve never flown with this group. It was less riveting than season two, but great nonetheless.
Love and Marriage Huntsville (Max) - I’ve been watching this in the background and am happy to report that The Comeback Group continues to fall apart only to be forced back together again. I’m a few seasons behind, so I’m watching Kimmy discover she has cancer and tell the group which was some of the saddest shit I’ve seen in a long time.
Win or Lose (Disney+) - I was charmed by this Disney Plus show, which is about a softball team’s championship game from a variety of perspectives—from the coach to their worst player. It’s so good, so cute, and culturally competent in a way all shows should be. I recommend that everyone watches it.
Trap (Netflix) - This is the movie that convinced me that M. Night Shyamalan is playing in our faces, because there’s no way this was serious. To be fair, the premise is interesting. A serial killer takes his daughter to a concert, only to find out that the entire thing has been turned into a sting operation to apprehend him. This could be interesting in theory but the plot has Tyler Perry-level problem-solving and characters constantly working against their own interests. Some other things: they got kid Cudi in a Lucius Malfoy wig playing a sort of Rick James diva and have the popstar riding in a limousine. We’re also subjected to 20 songs by this fictional popstar (apparently the director’s daughter who has real life popstar dreams). It’s a very long ad for her musical talents, but I will admit that the music isn’t that bad—it’s very Ariana Grande adjacent, which I wasn’t mad at.
Adolescence (Netflix) - I watch lots of true crime so it’s rare that I’m moved or compelled by a show but like everyone else, I was affected by this. I like that this focused less on the crime and more on the impact on various spheres. Episode four was the most impactful for me, seeing the family do their best to knit their lives back together really hit me in the feels. I also liked that they showed the impact of media on the mind’s and attitudes of young people—it hurts everyone in the end, so I’m glad it’s being addressed. Obviously everyone who falls down the red-pill rabbit hole doesn’t go out and murder their classmate, but it deftly illustrated the way already-existing tensions are worsened by intentionally inflammatory and dehumanizing ideology and how teens with low self esteem or dealing with feelings of rejection can be pushed to the extreme. While Jaime obviously had some mental health issues, as evidenced in episode three, he is not aberrant in his attitudes, so it would do us good to pay close attention to younger people and the way they’re thinking of our society.
Exhibiting Forgiveness (Hulu) - I watched this after seeing an Instagram Reel from the director Titus Kaphar talking about a scene between Andre Harrell and Aunjanue Ellis-Taylor. The film is loosely based on the artist’s Titus Kaphar’s life and his childhood. It opens with Kaphar on the precipice of
The Barkley Marathons: The Race That Eats Its Young (Peacock and Tubi)- Suddenly, as if my algorithm caught a cold, I got swept into Barkley marathon TikTok, which led me to watch the 2015 documentary about the race. The race, if you can even call it that, happens deep in Tennessee and is designed to strip people down to the studs. It’s one of those 100 mile ultramarathons where runners have to complete five 20-mile laps around a course that changes from year to year. Only a small part of it is on the trail. This is a race for people for whom 75 hard is quaint and pedestrian and despite their excitement to participate, everyone looks so tortured. It’s kind of charming. The race has been happening for almost 40 years. It was dreamed up by Laz Lake, the race director, who came up with the idea after James Earl Ray escaped from prison and only made it eight miles away from the prison in the Tennessee woods. Lake felt it was pitiful, and thus the race was born. The race is notoriously difficult to apply to. There’s a secretive application process and to apply the runner has to pay a non-refundable $1.60 If accepted, runners have to bring a license plate from their state. Returning runners have to bring an item of Lake’s choice. These have ranged from t-shirts to socks to flannel shirts, which I think is fun.
Anora (Hulu) - I can’t imagine that this movie set out to be a Best Picture nominee, because it doesn’t give that at all. It was not better than Conclave or Sing, Sing or The Nickel Boys and is the kind of movie I would’ve said, oh wow, that was really good but not stood up and clapped for. It’s just a movie where things happen, reinforcing my theory that plot is back. Another theory: if this movie had come out 15 years ago it would’ve been good, even classic, but not groundbreaking. Someone said that they liked Anora because the actors don’t know what kind of movie it is because it fluidly moves between genres, transforming from a romance to a comedy to a drama and is very briefly an action film and I agree. Mikey Madison did her big one, even though her accent made my head spin and I have a big crush on Igor and all the doofy bodyguards who are trying to make their boss happy and failing badly.
Two Ways with Erica Mena (Zeus) - I’m always watching a cursed Zeus show. Right now it’s Two Ways With Erica Mena, a dating show starring former Love & Hip Hop cast member Erica Mena, who is best known for gaslighting Cyn Santana after going back to her ain’t shit ass ex Rich Dollaz. It’s spiritually similar to Double Shot At Love, minus the massive bed and hidden cameras—I don’t even think the contestants are sleeping in the mansion. Zeus is likely renting by the day. There’s so much fighting they barely get to the contrived challenges and said challenges are always needlessly sexual. There’s so much nonsense and in-fighting going on and not unlike Double Shot, allegations of sex between contestants abound. Either way it's become my Sunday night entertainment and I like Mena a little bit more as a result.
Yellowjackets (Showtime) - The cannibal kids are back at it in season three and at this point, I’m tired of them. It’s exhausting to watch everyone in sustained spiritual psychosis and the closer the two timelines get, the less I care about the show. Most good shows start to fall apart in season three, and Yellowjackets is no exception.
The Residence (Netflix) - I love an upbeat caper, so The Residence is right up my alley. Uzo Adoba does a good job as Detective Cordelia Cupp and while the show is a bit slow—it feels like we’re really solving this mystery in real time–I’m liking it okay.
Con Mum (Netflix) - This is the latest in a line of conperson shows, and this one is particularly insidious. An elderly woman cons a chef by proclaiming to be his long lost mother. She extorts him and triangulates him, eventually bleeding him near-dry and ruining his life. This one has a lot of emotional poignancy, and in the end there’s a sense that nobody wins.
Best Bites
Bread at Ambrosia Garden'
Steak from S. Ottomanelli’s
Pizza from Brooklyn Pizza Crew
A fish taco and esquites from Tacombi
Chicken at Sailor
Fish at AbuQir
Croissant and ginger mint tea from Daytime
Fried snapper and fried rice from Jing Li
Fried rice from Matsuri
Roasted mushroom momo from Oases
Wish List
Balenciaga sunglasses I saw on a fabulous woman “they’re balenciaga, but I got them at cohen’s, she explained”
A small plate for my tea bag from Raazi
This asymmetric cardigan from Boheme Goods
These Lemaire heels
A lobster clasp jacket
20K words of my draft
Expense Report
Lots of books, including
The Colony by Annika Norlin, trans. Alice E. Olsson
House of Fury by Evelio Rosero, trans. Victor Meadowcroft
The Emperor by Makenzy Orcel
A Hole in The Story by Ken Kalfus
A copy of Nina Chanel Abney’s latest book, Big Butch Energy/Synergy for Madison M.’s birthday
You can read my stress through text lol A vintage St John’s sweatshirt from Etsy
Until next time.
Thank you for these!
omg PREACH on the Anora comments - felt absolutely the same. Watched it post oscars and couldn't help but keep thinking 'this is not a best picture' - sing sing forever honestly that was the best of them ALL and did not get its appropriate flowers in any awards. Love the purchase of The Colony bc I am so interested.