A Second Book Date

This time, at Dear Friend Books in Bed Stuy.

Hi everyone! For the second installment of Book Date I went out with writer

Tahirah Hairston

, who recently wrote a brilliant essay about her approach to taste for her Substack Ridiculous Little Things. When I was thinking about book dates Tahirah was one of the first people that came to mind because she’s incredibly well-read and is often referencing a documentary or book to underscore her point, which makes me want to be more prolific in my scholarship. She chose Dear Friend Books for our date, an ultra-curated bookstore in Bed Stuy that serves wine in unassuming cups and plays great music (I spent much of our interview pausing to Shazam songs, I made this playlist). We also had the most hilarious interaction while there, which I won’t write about here, but if you ever meet me IRL ask me to tell you the Dear Friend Books story, and if I don’t remember immediately, mention a candle. Ahead we talk about the books that shaped her, the book she wants to adapt into a miniseries, and her reading routine.

Please state your name for the record. 

Tahirah Hairston. 

What do you do? 

I’m a writer. 

Where are you from? 

Detroit, Michigan. 

How has being from Detroit shaped you and your literary world? 

I grew up in a predominantly Black city and went to a Black college, so I mostly read books by Black people. For example, I just found out about Phillip Roth. I grew up knowing who Toni Morrison and Nikki Giovanni and James Baldwin were. As I got older, I learned about other stuff. I was also one of those kids that grew up transferring schools a lot and using other people’s addresses because my mom wanted me to go to a good school. So my middle and high school were predominantly white. My grandma is very pro-Black, very intense, so she would make me do book reports on the side. She would let me pick my own books but it had to be a Black author and about Black history or culture. She would make me read the book, type up the book report, then we’d talk about the book together. She would give me $100 per report. I feel like I went to double school. It gave me my love for reading. I was also in this club called Coettes, kind of like Jack and Jill but for high school girls. I started a book club with the friends I made there called DEAR Divas, which stood for Drop Everything and Read Divas. 

What were some books you read for these book reports? 

The Bluest Eye by Toni Morrison, which, I don’t know if I should have been reading that. The Color of Water by James McBride. I read Jamaica Kincaid, and then some books about kwanzaa. My grandma was obsessed with kwanzaa. I used to be in a dashiki every December.

Do you ever reread books? 

I reread Sula. I’m going to do my third reread soon. It’s such a short book, around 228 pages. It’s so easy to reread. Their Eyes Were Watching God, which I read when I was younger. I reread it a year ago and watched the Oprah movie, which was not good. It’s a book that grows with you. Kind of how I rewatch Sex and the City and Girlfriends every year as I get older and I change, those are the books I reread to see how I identify with a character. Or how my understanding of Sula and Janie changes. Both of them are complicated. Janie kills her husband. Sula fucks her friend’s man. Rereading these books I can see how I’ve grown as a woman because of how I understand their stories. 

How has your understanding evolved as you’ve gotten older? 

When I was younger and hadn’t been through anything I agreed with society’s view of Sula. But reading it in my twenties and thirties, it’s like oh these women were doing things their own way and trying to survive. Sula and Janie taught me what a liberated Black woman can be. Those books really shaped how I move as a woman and what I think of as appropriate and what is inappropriate. I'm not saying I'm trying to kill some man, but those books taught me how important your happiness is. Both of those books demonstrated that in their own way. 

What other books have shaped you? 

Sassafrass, Cypress and Indigo by Ntozake Shange. It was my first time seeing young Black women who were into magic. And one lives in Harlem and is a ballet dancer. A period of my life was very Christian so reading that I was like, oh there’s another way, and the mom was really supportive. It’s my dream to adapt it into a miniseries. I’m not trying to be that girl, but, The Coldest Winter Ever by Sista Souljah. I read that book in a day. It shaped the way I view womanhood and how I can break through the barriers of it. As recently as last year I read The Unbearable Lightness of Being. The book opens with the idea of free will and living life based on do you want it to be light or do you want it to be not light? In the end two of these characters die under the crushing weight of their lives being too hard. One of the character’s lives was so light it meant nothing. It showed me life is about finding balance. At the time, I’d left a really hard job and believed that work should be hard and everything should be hard. It made me realize that life can be serious but you shouldn’t take it that seriously. 

I don’t think it shaped me but I read Our Kind Of People when I was younger and I loved it. Lee Daniels made it into an awful ABC show, one of the worst I’ve ever seen. It went through all these different cities and clubs and showed the world of the Black elite. One of the things that isn’t talked about in the Black community is classism and Our Kind of People showed you that. It was really interesting seeing what their standards and beliefs are. They look down on celebs, like Beyoncé’s not in their group.

How do you find new books to read? 

I read old magazine columns. New York Magazine used to do one where they asked authors what their favorite books are. Sometimes I get book recommendations from there. I also love a friend recommendation, especially people who don’t have prejudgments about books. People who read to read, not because they think it’s “important,” or the canon says they should be reading this. I’m not much of a current reader. I might buy new books but I won’t read them until a year or two later.

How many books did you read last year? 

13. It was a slow year for me. 

Favorite book of 2023? Or top three, or five, whichever.